Dear God– There's a big kid at school who's been beating me up every day.
If you are just and good, will you please smite Ricky so I can go about my life in peace?
Wow, now that I said that out loud, it sounds really awful.
Please don't be mad at me. Can I go to hell just for THINKING bad things? You can't possibly expect me to control every thought that pops into my head! Right?!
Oh, God! Now you're gonna smite ME, aren't you?! Oh, please don't smite me! I take it all back! Please!
Have mercy!
How come every natural impulse I have just gets me deeper in the hole with you?